A Teenager & Twins: The Balance

How do you balance being a mom of a teenage girl and 11 month old boy/girl twins?! Well let me tell you it’s not the easiest but not the hardest either.

I thought I was done having kids after my oldest daughter and I father split. I never wanted to get married nor have kids, but God had bigger plans for this girl. Let’s just say a few months after her father and I were over. 10 years of hard learned lessons, appreciating me and knowing my worth. My daughter Tenara and I fell in love with the man of my dreams. I wasn’t looking, but boy did God show up and show out.

Now, let’s fast forward to getting married, conceiving on our wedding night and finding out we were having not one but two babies. Shocked is an understatement but my how God works is absolutely amazing.Tenara always wanted siblings, so thirteen years later, surprise you get a brother and a sister all in one shot. She was excited to say the least but as months progressed you could tell by our conversations that she was worried about being left out. I mean she was the only child for 13 years and now has to share me with two other people. Hubby and I always reassured her that she would never be left out because we would need her help plus always make sure we spent time together one on one and as a family.

My whole twin pregnancy was rough from start to finish but some how by the grace of God I got through and carried full term(which is 37 1/2 weeks for multiples). As days passed Tenara would come to me about her stomach cramping, feeling weird, and not well. Of course I knew she would one day start her mensuration. We went to the doctor, had our talks on her becoming a young lady when the day came, and prepped her on what to expect and proper precautions.

Saturday September 16th, 2017 as I woke up at 6:30am, Tenara, hubby, and I prepared to get dressed and head in for my 10:30am scheduled C-Section. Tenara comes in our room frantic. Nervous as hell with many thoughts already running through my mind, I hysterically ask what happened?! “I started my period”, Tenara says. I try my best to make it feel as special as possible with everything going on, I give her a pep talk and a pack of pads I initially packed in my hospital bag and on our way to the hospital had hubby make a detour to get more. Poor hubby having to deal with both of our girl problems right?, lol. Of all days this just had to happen the day of the twins birth. A little girl turned into a young lady and two new people entered the world just hours later.

To answer the question how do I balance both? First and foremost Prayer is key to everything . Second, I make sure to take care of me. I can’t pour from an empty cup, and third, because of their age differences the kids all have different needs so I cater accordingly. Tenara tries to get away with more now that she sees we are busy with the twins, but honey if she only knew we got that ass on a tight leash and not loosening until that 18th birthday. I mean we’re not hella strict but we’re strict enough for her to think twice. The twins get easier as they get older. The first 3 months I wanted to jump out of a window several times. I basically started over with the twins and It’s not easy. It wasn’t easy when I had Tenara and it’s no easier now that I’m older and have to care for 2 at the same time, even with help. None the less I’m blessed and pray to God to give me the strength, because I don’t know how I get through most days. When it’s all said and done,us moms figure it out one way or another because we are who our children look to and look up to through what we call life.

Xo ~AMomStateofMind

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